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Weight Loss Forum / Low Carb / February 2005OT Grieving Specialist
So today I went to see a grieving specialist in hopes that I could be around people that feel the way I do in a group setting but she wants me to go to therapy due to my history of Major Depression and compulsive disorder and to go on meds. I told her meds aren't right for me at this time I feel to Ok to numb myself... I like feeling and missed it when I had to be on meds. I also told her I was going to feel my way past the one year anniversary of my dads death and call one of her therapists if I feel I need it. She told me to keep a journal because all therapy is, is talking your feelings out and that just might be enough for me. I told her I will do that. I'm just scared because my dad passed away on Feb 5th and my birthday is Feb 4th. I'm worried that it might be to much for me to deal with. How do you enjoy your birthday after something like that? I'm only 30 I should get at least a call from my mom and dad at this age, at least after my mom passed away I still had my dad. I feel so bad for people that loose there parents when they are kids they must miss them so much when they have big events happening (first date, prom, getting braces off, graduation, learning to drive) I know I will miss them when I have a baby. I just had to get it off my chest, sorry Angie (((((((((((((((((AngieRose))))))))))))))))))))) -- Cheri AngieRose wrote in message ... >So today I went to see a grieving specialist in hopes that I could be around >people that feel the way I do in a group setting but she wants me to go to [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] >I just had to get it off my chest, sorry >Angie > (((((((((((((((((AngieRose))))))))))))))))))))) > > -- > Cheri Thank you Cheri Angie > I'm just scared because my dad passed away on Feb 5th and my birthday is Feb > 4th. I'm worried that it might be to much for me to deal with. How do you [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > I just had to get it off my chest, sorry I'm so sorry for your loss, Angie :-( This is the first year for you, so it will be hard, but it DOES get better with time. A long time ago I lost someone early in December -- he had gone into a coma the day after Thanksgiving, so Thanksgiving and Christmas were hard for me for a long time, but it got better each year. {{{{{{{{{{ ANGIE }}}}}}}}}}  SignatureSaffire 205/144/125 - 5'1.5" Atkins since 6/14/03 Progress photo: http://photos.yahoo.com/saffire333 > I'm so sorry for your loss, Angie :-( This is the first year for you, > so it will be hard, but it DOES get better with time. A long time ago I > lost someone early in December -- he had gone into a coma the day after > Thanksgiving, so Thanksgiving and Christmas were hard for me for a long > time, but it got better each year. {{{{{{{{{{ ANGIE }}}}}}}}}} Its been almost 6 years since my mom passed and it does get less painfull unless I really think about it. I hope your right and my birthday will get more enjoyable as time passes. I have to stop thinking of it as the day before. Thanks Saffire Angie > So today I went to see a grieving specialist in hopes that I could be > around [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] > I just had to get it off my chest, sorry > Angie I hear you, Angie, and get it. The best thing you can ever do for yourself is get past the drama and make a life for youraself. Nobody will do that better for yourself than you can. We all have lost people. I know it hurts. You have to decide what you want to do. > I hear you, Angie, and get it. > [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > We all have lost people. I know it hurts. You have to decide what you want > to do. I'm trying my best to move on after all they did right? I just have to remember that they are together again and much more happy then when they were apart. Hey at least it didn't happen on my birthday and I got to talk to my dad the night before. Thank you Jim Angie > I'm just scared because my dad passed away on Feb 5th and my birthday is Feb > 4th. ================== My father passed away in 1982 and I still miss him. SignatureWysong Age 60. Height 5'6" Starting date: 1/8/05 171/ 166 / 140 lb ========================================== > So today I went to see a grieving specialist in hopes that I could be around > people that feel the way I do in a group setting but she wants me to go to [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > I just had to get it off my chest, sorry > Angie Angie, My dad died in a car accident last April--I know how you're feeling right now. My birthday was yesterday, and it was hard not having him around, same as it's been hard on all of the holidays and special occasions. My mother is still grieving deeply, but I think the meds help her a lot, as well as being surrounded and supported by family. I really think a support group can help you to express your feelings of loss in a healthy way. The grief process is different for everyone--we have to cope in our own way. My way was to throw myself into a variety of work and home projects and to make myself to busy to think too much. I also took over my father's business--something that ties me to him in many ways. Getting through this time will be hard, but my advice (and I hope I can follow my own when the time comes) is to use the day to pay homage to your father. Perhaps visiting a place or doing an activity you both enjoyed. Or just visiting his site and having a talk--and a good cry. Hope all goes well, and have a good birthday. Amy > Angie, > > My dad died in a car accident last April--I know how you're feeling > right now. My birthday was yesterday, and it was hard not having him > around, same as it's been hard on all of the holidays and special > occasions. Amy I'm so sorry about your dad and Happy Biirthday. The first year is always so hard because its all new and you expect the call or to see them as always. When I feel like I want to call both my mom and dad I just talk to them. > My mother is still grieving deeply, but I think the meds help her a lot, > as well as being surrounded and supported by family. I really think a [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > projects and to make myself to busy to think too much. I also took over > my father's business--something that ties me to him in many ways. My dad just existed for 3 years after my mom passed he worked went to sleep got up to eat then went to sleep then worked and so on. The 4th year he found a GF but all he talked about was how much she was like my mom. I dont kow how old your mom is but when my mom passed they were both 48. My mom had cancer and told my dad to find someone that will love and take care of him. I hope your mom can get past this sad event unlike my dad. > Getting through this time will be hard, but my advice (and I hope I can > follow my own when the time comes) is to use the day to pay homage to > your father. Perhaps visiting a place or doing an activity you both > enjoyed. Or just visiting his site and having a talk--and a good cry. I live 1700 miles away from home so all I have are photos and the hope that they can hear me when I speak to them. Amy I picked up this book a few months ago : How to Survive the Loss of a Parent - A guide for adults... Lois F Akner C.S.W. with Catherine Whitney. I thought it was helpfull. > Hope all goes well, and have a good birthday. Thank you Angie > Amy I picked up this book a few months ago : How to Survive the Loss of a > Parent - A guide for adults... Lois F Akner C.S.W. with Catherine Whitney. I [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > Angie Thank you, Angie. I will look for the book. Take care, Amy > So today I went to see a grieving specialist... {{{{Angie}}}} Have you ever done Cognitive Behavior Therapy? I don't know what it is, but apparently it's good for dealing with things that can't be dealt with by talk therapy / psychotherapy. Out of curiosity I'd just borrowed some books and hope to learn a bit about it. Another strategy is to think about people who are in worse situations than yourself, I guess it helps to make the pain more bearable because you won't feel so alone. > > So today I went to see a grieving specialist... > [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > therapy / psychotherapy. Out of curiosity I'd just borrowed some books and hope > to learn a bit about it. Cognitive Therapy was the best thing I ever did it helped me learn how to deal/control my social anxiety, temper, compulsive disorder and depression. > Another strategy is to think about people who are in worse situations than > yourself, I guess it helps to make the pain more bearable because you won't feel > so alone. I try to do this I know I'm not the worst off because I lost my mom and dad so young. I know people are starving and people just lost large amounts of family and homes thanks to the tsunami and I know young children all over the world loose parents everyday. I understand this and thank God everyday for what I have. I also thank god for such good Parents. Thanks for the hug, Angie Thanks for sharing. :-) >>>So today I went to see a grieving specialist... >> [quoted text clipped - 32 lines] > Thanks for the hug, > Angie > I'm just scared because my dad passed away on Feb 5th and my birthday is > Feb > 4th. I'm worried that it might be to much for me to deal with. Oh, Angie, that is so rough. My Mum's and my sister's birthdays are very close together; since Mum died, we've celebrated my sister's birthday the weekend before, and had a special remember for Mum the weekend after. The separation has helped us, especially my sister. Nicky. SignatureA1c 10.5/5.7/<6 Weight 95/78/72Kg 1g Metformin, 87.5ug Thyroxine T2 DX 05/2004 > > I'm just scared because my dad passed away on Feb 5th and my birthday is > > Feb [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Nicky. Thanks for the advice I'll have to do that next year... This year its just to late. This year I'm going to be around a lot of friends so I hope that helps then I work on sat so maybe I wont have time to think about it. I hope you and your sister are doing well. Angie > I hope > you and your sister are doing well. We are, thankyou. One day at a time, sometimes. But it does get better. Nicky. |
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