Feeling weird about my bod

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Annie Benson Lennaman - 24 Sep 2006 10:58 GMT

I'm having a situation that is kinda hard for me describe. I
recently bought a grey sweater top on ebay
(http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ih=002&item=120029950041&rd=1&sspa
gename=STRK%3AMEWN%3AIT&rd=1,
if you're interested on how it looks). I look a bit lumpier in than
then the manniquen does, but overall I think it looks pretty good on
me. But, when I look at myself in the mirror with it, I just feel, I
dunno, sorta unreal. I can't shake the feeling that there's some sort
of a mistake, that I don't really look the way I do now. I have a
nagging feeling of doubt that I'm just fooling myself, that that image
in the mirror isn't really me.

I know this is pretty strange. Have any of you ever gone through
feelings like this? If so, how long did it take for them to go away?

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Annie

As of 09-21-06: 258/187/140 Standing at 5 foot 4.

71 pounds lost. 47 left to go. Started February/07/05

Come visit my weight-loss web site, Annie Takes Off.
http://webpages.charter.net/lenny13/DietFrontPage.html

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Nunya B. - 24 Sep 2006 13:52 GMT

> I know this is pretty strange. Have any of you ever gone through
> feelings like this? If so, how long did it take for them to go away?

Yes.

3 years later it still happens at times, though not as often.

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the volleyballchick

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Chris Braun - 24 Sep 2006 14:50 GMT

>> I know this is pretty strange. Have any of you ever gone through
>> feelings like this? If so, how long did it take for them to go away?
>
>Yes.
>
>3 years later it still happens at times, though not as often.

I also still find it occasionally jarring, though not as much as I
used to. At first I'd often be quite startled when I saw myself in a
mirror -- just felt like I was looking at another person. I think the
feeling is exacerbated by wearing something different than you might
have chosen before. (For me, high heels were a biggie :-).)

Chris
262/130s/130s
started dieting July 2002, maintaining since June 2004

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Annie Benson Lennaman - 25 Sep 2006 03:22 GMT

> I also still find it occasionally jarring, though not as much as I
> used to. At first I'd often be quite startled when I saw myself in a
> mirror -- just felt like I was looking at another person. I think the
> feeling is exacerbated by wearing something different than you might
> have chosen before. (For me, high heels were a biggie :-).)

Jarring. That is the exact right word. It's nice hearing from both
the Chris's to know that others have had the same sort of experience as
this.

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Annie Benson Lennaman - 25 Sep 2006 03:26 GMT

> Jarring. That is the exact right word. It's nice hearing from both
> the Chris's to know that others have had the same sort of experience as
> this.

Whoops, sorry, still foggy this morning. I meant Chris Braun and
Nunya.

Chris B:

I've lost just about 71 pounds. I think part of my issue is that I'm
just now getting to a point where I can see a definate difference in
myself. Other could when I was 30 down, but I simply could not. Talk
about your distorted body self image!

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Chris Braun - 25 Sep 2006 19:35 GMT

>> Jarring. That is the exact right word. It's nice hearing from both
>> the Chris's to know that others have had the same sort of experience as
[quoted text clipped - 9 lines]
>myself. Other could when I was 30 down, but I simply could not. Talk
>about your distorted body self image!

I think this is related to the thing about being surprised by one's
image. I know I had a sort of image in my mind of what I looked like
that didn't really change much for quite a while after my body
changed. Generally that mental picture would influence what I saw in
the mirror, so I'd still look like the heavier person I used to be.
But every now and again when I'd catch an unexpected glimpse of myself
I'd be very startled by what I saw. (I still find that when
exercising in the group classes at the gym, where there are mirrors
all around the room, I sometimes don't pick out the right image for
myself immediately, but will instead see a heavier woman's image and
think it's me. Weird...)

Chris
262/130s/130s
started dieting July 2002, maintaining since June 2004

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The Historian - 30 Sep 2006 05:37 GMT

> I know I had a sort of image in my mind of what I looked like
> that didn't really change much for quite a while after my body
[quoted text clipped - 6 lines]
> myself immediately, but will instead see a heavier woman's image and
> think it's me. Weird...)

I have a related problem. Whenever I pass a mirror, I am tempted to
stop and look at myself. You see, I haven't been this thin in years,
and even when I was, I wasn't inclined to look. I'm not half-bad
looking. Yes, I'm too fat, and prematurely graying, but aside from
those minor flaws.... oh, I fear I am becoming like the rival poets in
W. S. Gilbert's Patience:

************************

Grosvenor: It is very pleasant to be alone. It is pleasant to be able
to gaze at leisure upon those features which all others may gaze upon
at their good will! (Looking at his reflection in hand-mirror.) Ah, I
am a very Narcissus!

Enter Bunthorne, moodily.

Bunthorne: It's no use; I can't live without admiration. Since
Grosvenor came here, insipidity has been at a premium. Ah, he is there!

Grosvenor: Ah, Bunthorne! Come here - look! Very graceful, isn't it!

Bunthorne: (taking hand-mirror) Allow me; I haven't seen it. Yes, it is
graceful.

Grosvenor: (re-taking hand-mirror) Oh, good gracious! not that - this
-

*****************

Neil
385/289/210 - and ladies, he's single!

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Chris B - 24 Sep 2006 18:01 GMT

I've lost as much as 60+ pounds at a time, and I'm not sure what you mean.
How much weight did you lose total?

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determined - 25 Sep 2006 04:26 GMT

> I'm having a situation that is kinda hard for me describe. I
> recently bought a grey sweater top on ebay
[quoted text clipped - 9 lines]
> I know this is pretty strange. Have any of you ever gone through
> feelings like this? If so, how long did it take for them to go away?

I have other body image issues. Although I've never been terribly
overweight, I was 170 the day I came home from the hospital last December
from giving birth. Somehow, 125 seemed so far off, I doubted I'd ever make
it back. It became this magical number at which everything would be "right"
again. Well, it's not. My body doesn't look like it did the last time I
weighed 125! I have stretch marks, saggy boobs, loose skin, wider hips,
crows feet, etc. I don't look the way I had hoped, but I really don't think
I had realistic expectations. I just look smaller, but not much different.

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Matty (I Weighed More Than Jared From Subway) - 25 Sep 2006 18:01 GMT

Actually had that feeling this weekend pulling out clothes to list on eBay.
Blows my mind that a lot of it was real *tight* on me at one point.

I blogged the other day on my MySpace page that I saw my clavicles. Never
noticed that before and it's strange to look in the mirror after a shower
and see a totally different person looking back.

I think that feeling will always be there, and that can be a good thing in a
way...

Matty (I weighed more than Jared from Subway)
481/248/225
(starting weight/current weight/goal weight)

First mini goal achieved - 104lbs lost 10/26/04
Second mini goal achieved - 137lbs lost 01/28/05
Third mini goal achieved - 183lbs lost 09/30/05
Fourth mini goal achieved - 204lbs total lost 01/30/06
Fifth mini goal achieved - 233lbs total lost by 08/31/06

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